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I came across this article on the Lonely Planet website. It describes the best traveling companions for each sign of the zodiac. I thought if was cute, even though it was also a painful reminder that, due the COVID-19, our ability to travel has been sharply curtailed. For most of us, our favorite travel companion, at least for the near future, is likely to be our imagination.

Still, the article got me thinking. If these are the best travel companions, which signs would be worst? It turns out that, if you think about it, every sign has the potential to make you wish you’d stayed a home.

Aries – Aries likes drive-by vacations. You go. You see. You go on to the next thing. Lingering is not allowed, and don’t even think about waiting in a long line. Also, don’t think about having a plan. Plans are for wimps. Aries travelers just go.

Taurus – If you think you’re going to get through this trip without carrying some of Taurus’ overstuffed luggage, you are sadly mistaken. Taurus people don’t mind leaving home as long as they can take all the conveniences and comforts of home with them, and you can’t expect them to carry all those bags by themselves.

Gemini – Gemini travelers are a tour guides worst nightmare. No matter how much that person knows about the place you’re visiting, the Gemini is going to know more, and he or she will keep yakking to you about it until the tour guide gives up or finds a way to leave the two of you behind.

Cancer – The Cancer traveler starts feeling homesick on the walk from his or her front door to the car. While you’re pouring over brochures, they’re trying to communicate with their cat through their webcam back home. Your trip will be over the second that cat starts looking sad.

Leo – Leos go first class or they don’t go at all. Really, do you expect your Leo friends to take their shoes off at the airport or stand in long lines with the herd? So, if you have a Leo traveling companion you might want to float a loan, or maybe just stay home and watch Rick Steves instead.

Virgo – If you’re traveling with a Virgo you can expect that every aspect of your trip will be carefully planned and that the Virgo will have a detailed itinerary for each day. However, you might want to add a little extra time for the nervous breakdown your Virgo friend is going to suffer the moment any part of those plans go awry.

Libra – You Libra traveling companion is going to stop and look at all the pretty things. They can get lost in a museum and wax poetic before a natural wonder. In fact, you might feel so privileged to have such a pleasant and thorough engaged companion that you overlook the fact that you’re the one carrying all the luggage.

Scorpio – Your Scorpio traveling companion shows up with tickets he or she acquired on the "dark web" and takes you to an Airbnb in a dicey neighborhood with instructions not to look in the closets. No doubt you’ll save a lot of money traveling with a Scorpio, but you might need it to pay your bail.

Sagittarius – For Sagittarius, traveling is always an adventure. The adventure might begin at the airport when they tell you they’ve misplaced their passport, or in the hotel lobby when they realize they forgot to book a room. These unexpected detours are just part of the fun for Sagittarius. You may call them by another name.

Capricorn – “Listen up! This journey will begin at 0600. All bags will be pack. Travel documents will be in order. The itinerary for the trip will be memorized. Tardiness will not be tolerated. Slacker will be left behind.” If this sounds like a fun trip to you, then you’re ready for a Capricorn traveling companion. If not, you might still get drafted.

Aquarius – Be prepared to go somewhere totally different and totally unexpected. Your Aquarius traveling companion saw something about it on an obscure website, so there won’t be a crowd. There might be a few armed guards, however, and maybe some aliens. Yeah, that kind of alien. Ready to go?

Pisces – Paris, France or Paris, Texas. London, England or London, Kentucky. It’s all the same for Pisces people. They can kick back and relax pretty much anywhere. That makes them the perfect traveling companions, that is if you want to do all the planning, make all the arrangements and wake Pisces when it’s time to go.

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